Lost

                "Please, don't cry" he said, looking her head down.

            She didn't answer, neither listen. She was absorbed by her fear and sadness.

            He felt he wasn’t helping at all, he knew he couldn't do anything, nothing, just stepped back. One step back and she felt it, he was afraid too, he couldn't help her, no-one could, no one wanted to. As he stepped he realized he wasn't the person he said he was, all the promises of concern and worry banished suddenly by fear, by the fear of see another crying, losing in the void that surrenders, just like her, all lonely. He didn't even want to hug her, comfort her, a touch in her hand to let her see he was with her, no, he just stepped back. There wasn't one fear, hers, the loneliness of losing and become just one, just one left behind, but also there was his, the fear of the unknown, of feel the feelings of someone else like own, of taking too much care, to matter.

            Then, she stopped crying, there was no point, yes she had lost more than anyone deserves, by crying she was going nowhere. But the sadness was too much to contain without a cracked face, so she looked him in his scared and disgusted eyes. "Are you okay?" he asked with a smile, trying to make her feel better, but the smile was a lie, she knew it and the concern meaningless. "How long can this last?" she wondered and sat up. That wasn’t the first time that happened."You don't care about me, just go away" she blurted out, and he, with and angry face walked away, knowing she was right. She sat down again and rubbed her eyes, ending her hands soaked in salty-bitter tears. "I've lost them" she said to herself, thinking about the notice that has crooked her soul and life in a second. "… and them too" continued thinking of the fake ones who were supposed to take care of her. All of them, the fake ones, looked at her with an angry and hurt face, they thought they did not deserve this and she does, she thinks the same thing upside down. She leaned down and felt all lonely, with no one left behind and no one forward by the way to the hospital. They looked at her trail all angry and self centered, a few ones wondered if they should track her down, but no one did.

            The woman took off the white clothes over their hurt faces; no one was left without bruises. She held her tears back and bitted her lip, making them bleed. She said their names, one by one, the three of them, pronouncing them softly, wishing that was the last time to  say them that way, with that pain, "Brentt" "Marissa" "Darian". Someone touched her shoulder softly and turned her, face to face, and hugged her tightly. There was one person who haven't left her behind, not the most expected, almost the most forgotten but at that moment the most important, her pain has private her from see that person, only see the lost and devastated. Maybe a smile can came out after that, a true one. 

Escrito en 2013